My Dear Friend, 🙂
I’m glad to see you, but at the same time, I am terribly sorry you’re here. I know you’re angry, full of misery, and more than just a little confused.
Now, instead of asking “canned” questions designed to fill up a page, possibly confusing you worse, I will simply speak what’s on my mind, and you can judge this for yourself. 🙂
First, if your spouse is between the ages of 35 to 55, and they are acting out of the ordinary, it’s very possible they’re going through a mid-life crisis. The articles within should help you to better understand what’s happening.
Second, I’m not a mind reader, nor a psychic, but I suspect you’re here because your spouse isn’t acting themselves lately, or it’s possible you’ve already been subjected to the “emotional bomb” that has devastated you, or even because you’re looking for more resources to help you in this quest for knowledge that will lead to a deeper understanding.
Third, gained knowledge is a very powerful tool, and you can find some of that here. You could start by reading “The Unwanted Emotional Bomb,” which will give you some insight in yourself, and your spouse.
Afterward, read “The Six Stages of a Mid-Life Crisis” to get a better idea of where your situation currently stands.
The sole purpose of this particular resource is to help people learn as much as they can about the mid-life crisis.
Within the depths of this place, you’ll learn how a mid-life crisis usually begins, how it should end, coping strategies, and hopefully, take some measure of peace with you every time you visit. 🙂
For the purpose of easy navigation, you’ll find my list of articles by clicking SiteMap. I also have a section that contains Questions and Answers you can read.
No one wants to feel they are the only one within a bad situation holding on as best they can to a marriage that seems destroyed beyond repair; so, I’m also here to confirm you’re not the first I’ve seen, nor will you be the last.
However, though the very real idea of the mid-life crisis is new to you, this has destroyed people’s lives since Biblical times. So, this is not a “new” trial, just new people going through for the first time, and hopefully last time in their lives. It’s not a medically recognized term, nor can it be “fixed” by anyone, except the person that’s directly going through.
Who I am doesn’t matter, what really matters is who YOU can and should become as a result of this experience. I’ve already walked this entire road, finished all aspects, and emerged whole and healed, a long time ago. I’ve chosen to stay, and with the help of the Lord, I hope to help others reach this same place I now stand in. There is more about me on the “About” page located above in the navigational bar.
But, enough about me. Let’s talk about you. How are you feeling? Are you sleeping? Are you eating enough? Have you gone to the doctor for help? I know it’s hard for you at the moment. Can’t eat, can’t sleep, mind is running wide open, can’t shut it off, wish the horrible things that are happening would stop, and you don’t know what to do about all of it.
Listen, in time, you’ll be just fine, I promise, although I know it doesn’t look like it at this moment. Your own outlook should improve, again, given time, along with the deepening of your own understanding within the realm of what has happened, and what will possibly happen in the future.
Time is what you have to work with at the moment, as this whole process will take time to complete. When your spouse turned completely against you, he/she put you upon a path that was not of your own making, but this now becomes all about you, just as their emotional crisis/midlife crisis is all about them.
I’m here to help you find answers through my own unique way of targeting the many aspects within the situation of the mid-life crisis through my writings. I directly address the deeper emotional and spiritual aspects affecting the mid-life spouse in crisis, that one has to see to believe, and I can tell you people have seen what I have written about.
In the past, I’ve been labeled a radical and worse, but I’ve never written about something I haven’t already seen before. Explaining the various aspects seen/experienced within a mid-life crisis isn’t going to make this time of life resolve any faster, but it will help you to understand that what you’re seeing is real, and not a figment of your imagination.
My writings are based on what God has given me, along with other resources I’ve read, researched and learned from over time. Plus, I gained wisdom, knowledge, experience, and a deeper insight through my personal journey into wholeness and healing.
I don’t ascribe to any one particular teaching or resource. For instance, I don’t directly follow the teachings of Freud, Jung, and Erickson. By my admission, I’m not well-read on any of them. Their combined teachings helped create the vastly differing “schools” of thought, taught about in various colleges and universities.
They’re helpful, but my source of inspiration is God, who created this time of life, along with many others, and only He knows what lies ahead. There are many possibilities within the one crisis, and my job is to pass along what I know so I can help others along the way.
Coupled with the Lord’s Guidance, I hope to help increase your own knowledge, understanding, wisdom, and aid in bringing you, too, into this same place.
It matters not to me, whether you are a believer, agnostic, or somewhere between, you are still a person with feelings, wants and desires.
There is hope as long you love your spouse in crisis. When hope is gone, love will leave with it.
I will help you as best I can, but remember I am not a licensed therapist or counselor. I can’t make any guarantees about the outcome and where it may lead. All I can do is expose the necessary tools, show you how to attain them, and recommend ways you can use them within your own personal situation. I’m an adviser, used of God, and advising is all I can do. The rest, as it stands, is up to you, as it always was and has been.
Feel free to use the contact link above to ask questions along the way. I look forward to hearing from you. 🙂
Any generalized questions received may be answered in future articles.
In the meantime, take good care of yourself. If you don’t take care of yourself in the best way you can, you will find yourself unable to care for others. I wish I could reach out and hug you so hard, but this will have to do:
((((((((((((((((((((((((Dear Friend)))))))))))))))))))))
May God be with you when you can walk, carry you when you can’t, and bless you richly every day of your life. 🙂
BIG, BIG HUGS!!
Love,
HB