Another writing drawn from a recent forum post of mine that contains encouragement that can apply to all people–not just the person it was written to. 🙂 It’s a good reminder that God knows what He’s doing, even when we do not know what He has in mind. In addition, everything is a true process, and it all takes TIME to accomplish. 🙂 Since GOD is the Man with the Plan–it would behoove us to learn to trust Him in all things. ((HUGS))
I had gotten so used to dealing with him in a certain way, and I need to get used to this change yet again. Don’t despair of me just yet – I will learn I feel a bit disheartened for some reason – disappointed in myself, that I have let myself down.
Oh, mercy me, I do not think of you like that. You are showing incredible strength in the face of strong adversity. Satan may seek to rule the day, but God has this battle in His Hands. He does encourage us to make a Stand, and give it to Him for the battle is God’s, and no other. ((HUGS))
My heart goes to you, Sweetie, because I do not think people realize that even as far along as I am within my advanced journey, I, too, have thoughts like these. Oh yeah, LOL, I know, if I’M feeling these things, we’re really in trouble! However, it is not like you would think. I learned to have faith, trust, and belief that God always has a plan, always makes a way, and as human beings, we do not always see what God sees. All we can see, as human beings with limited sight, is what is behind us, and what is directly in front of us.
It takes a lot of faith to be able to look beyond our present circumstances, and trust that God really does have better things in store for us going into the future. It is discouraging at times, but take heart, because with God, who is for us, who or what can be against us? Certainly not existing circumstances, that God is most able to help us overcome.
Been there, too.
I was thinking this morning of how difficult these paths become, and how differently I have to advise different people in different situations. I told the Lord that if advice fell into just as much of a life’s “script” as immaturity, and even the midlife crisis “speech” does, my own job would be that much easier. Each situation I look into/advise in has a different “feel” different dynamic, and the journey as a whole on each part is based on the unresolved issues within each person going through.
The rearing one experienced in childhood is based on the knowledge of the parents who learned from their parents, when they were reared, so each generation has learned from the last generation. Good and bad comes together to be sorted out, just like the Bible speaks of separating the wheat from the tares–the good is deemed as being OK, and it’s set aside, while the bad is endured, withstood, and overcome.
The final resolution leads into the bad transforming into the good, as the major lessons are learned…and like anything else, this takes the most argued against, and hated, word on this forum–TIME. However, TIME is actually a good thing, if you learn to see it that way, because time is what anyone has to work with, and this time is a gift if people would learn to view it as such.
I have been there, too so I sincerely understand that there are people who would tend to see this gift of time as an insult. What they are seeing in the early days is their lives as being torn apart, and destroyed, as their lives seem to be totally disintegrated. As a result, they are initially blinded to this gift of time, and the opportunity they have been given to work with, and use, wisely. It is actually OK to feel this way in the beginning, because this particular piece of knowledge always comes from someone who has been there, done that, and come through that particular aspect of this experience.
However, to reach this realization of Time as the Gift it really is, again, it all takes TIME to make an emotional adjustment, to readjust to the unwanted change that has been thrust into their lives by the unwanted emotional bomb. Everything in this life comes full circle as time marches on as it always has. Time waits for no man or woman who fights a necessary process that is beneficial to them, but they will not see this mistake they made, until enough time goes by that takes them into this realization.
Time encompasses everything in our lives, and as a result, time would breed certain expectations on our part.
People want road maps and timelines—and as a human being, you know why they do. They want to “mark” progress, (How much farther before this trial ends?) as well as know what to “expect” (How long does this trial take?) in the way of time.
They are focused on getting out of this trial as soon as possible, and if they do not have to “do” anything, they will not, because their expectations (length of journey, and time taken to complete this) dictate that the one who did this, will pay, and is going to pay dearly.
The emotionally devastated human being feels that they are entitled (expectations again) to a return to their life before it became disrupted. No person is “special” or “entitled” to anything, and once confronted with the beginning of a journey, there is no going back, because the door back, is locked, barred, and the only way out, that leads into peace, is through.
Of course, we, all have choices. We can all choose to procrastinate, struggle against what we need to do for ourselves, waste TIME trying to figure out a way to avoid our Self, just like the midlife spouse avoids their Self–but what you do not face, resolve, and heal, will return. It is only a matter of–there is that dreaded, and unwanted word again–TIME.
In TIME, most people take that tentative beginning step, and start the journey of a lifetime, one that that will enrich their lives, adjust their attitudes, teach them so much more about their Selves, and mature them as God originally meant for them to become.
I do not lie to people about how hard it is to walk this road. It is not a straight path that leads into the end of the life’s journey–it is filled with hairpin turns, hills that transform into mountains, which lead into the deepest of valleys, obstacles, potholes, deep ruts, and large rocks. In addition, the road is dusty, and one’s mouth often feels like they have ingested so much dust, it is hard to breathe, their throats are dry, their eyes are burning, and sometimes, they just stop, lay down, and throw a tantrum. It is just TOO HARD!! However, no one can do it for them, nor to them, and so, they face two choices–stay where they are, or get up and keep walking forward….the second option is always best, because you can’t finish a journey if you’re laying down in the road, and refusing to move forward.
As my mind continued to turn these aspects over, plus many more, for further thought, the Lord reminded me once more that as every person is different, each situation is also different, and what works for one, will not work for others. In addition, advice given according to the gift of Insight would not always be the same for each situation I look within. I am sure this is true when you are thinking of ICs, MCs, and other kinds of counselors who look at situations that often appear the same, but the dynamics within each one are so vastly different, and require such different handling.
One thing people are so often guilty of, is looking for clear and distinct signage that shows a path that will lead forward in such a way they will not mistake it for something else. However, most of the time, what they think they see, is NOT what they have actually seen, but something else that is disguised, and hidden under another layer of the journey they are witnessing. People standing on the outside, cannot see clearly into the inside of a person, but the situation will often reflect different dynamics at different times. It is often hard to keep up with what’s going on.
Since depression, anger, withdrawal, and emotional cycling are clearly present throughout the midlife crisis, things can change by the day, if not by the hour, or even by the minute. I usually suggest for people to learn to Be Still, and know that God is God, who knows all things. Of course, as we know, this is not a literal interpretation, but a piece of advice that is internalized, and Being Still is about keeping the focus on ourselves, while we release the midlife spouse into the most capable hands of God to deal with.
This inability to see clearly into the inside dynamics of a human being is more common when looking into someone else’s life, i.e. the midlife spouse, whose emotional cycling is confusing, because the various issues they’re struggling to resolve aren’t all familiar to the LBS. No matter what anyone might say, they do NOT “know” the midlife spouse as well as they think they do. They may have lived with them for X amount of years, loved them for all that time, been with them, seen them through so many times of difficulty, good times were had, but do they really “know” them?
No, because no one person will ever fully “know” another, unless they are like God, who knows each person through and through. People are charged with learning how to deal with themselves, how to effect change, growth, and becoming within their Self, and no one on the “outside” of them has any clue about everything they will face in their lifetime, and hopefully learn to overcome. ((HUGS))
Even as deeply equipped as God has allowed me to be, I do not know everything either, and sometimes I look into a situation, and think, “What the heck is going on here?” Fortunately, for me, I have that additional help that God has been so generous in giving, so I can have assistance in continuing to help people in the best way I can. I am very thankful unto the Lord, because what I do not have knowledge of or about, He will supply my need so I can do the work He’s assigned me to do.
I am always in awe of the absolute range of gifts that God has given me–most of them work without a lot of thought and concentration on my own part. Others, I will put out in the forefront, of my Self, and ask God for the strength I need to help me complete whatever task I need to finish.
I seem to always be ever-changing, ever-adjusting, and the more knowledge I acquire in anything, the more knowledge I receive for the purpose of being this “help” that God selected me to be in Him.
Well, it is always a good thing, because He does not just show me the possibilities of the future, but also of the present, and the past. These are based on the descriptions that are written that trigger recognition that leads into a flash of Insight, or the deep-seated gift of Perception that allows me to disassemble what someone is sharing with me, and helps to know what I’m seeing, and to also know what it means.
It seems to all come natural, but this is not a “natural” thing for me, it is a true gift that originated from God, and it seems to keep growing, because I do not think I have walked this particular road before with anyone that was as determined as you are to see this through.
Most people give up early on, and there are few who stay the course beyond a second time. That is their choice, and I respect and honor that, but true strength is shown as the person, who does not think they are showing that much strength, makes a Stand that is true and strong in its nature, and trusts God with everything in their lives.
You are the epitome of that strength–you are determined to see this through to whatever end it will come to, and you know that if you don’t make this Stand, you will always wonder, “What if” “What if” “What if” for the rest of your life.
So, Stand you will, and we will help you Stand. God is not leaving you by yourself, because your intuition is strong, sure, and accurate. You are trusting this still, small voice more and more as time goes on, and this is a great thing for you. ((HUGS))
Take these words of encouragement in the same spirit they were given, in love and admiration for what you are, and ever shall be, is rooted and grounded in God, who is supplying all of your needs, and is strengthening you even more as each day passes.
Trust Him, be not afraid, know that He holds you in His Hands, and always remember: Don’t be discouraged, because God always has a plan. ((HUGS))
